Bookstagrammer Paisley Reece Reviews If Only I Had Told Her by Laura Nowlin Review
For anyone who loved Laura Nowlin’s first book in the series “If He Had Been with Me,” “If Only I Had Told Her” Is an absolute must read to follow.
This story follows Finn (Finny), Autumn, and Jack. In the first book we see how Autumn and Finn go from childhood best friends to, essentially, strangers. This rift in Autumn and Finn’s relationship causes them to create different friend groups in high school which leads Finn to become friends with Jack. In this sequel, it shows what led to Finn’s death and the love that he had for Autumn and the impact he had on everyone’s lives. The story then continues and shows how Autumn and Jack process his death and get through their grief.
The second book is spilt into three main parts, the first being Finn’s point of view where readers are able to capture who Finn is as a person. We see his flaws and thoughts laid bare. We find out what was going through Finn’s mind in scenes that we were originally unable to in the first book (If He Had Been with Me). We are able to understand what happened between Finn and Autumn from Finn’s perspective. By adding in Finn’s version of events it really amplified everything that happened in the original book while also breathing new life into Finn’s character. Laura Nowlin creates an intense sense of grief at the point of Finn's death even though we have already experienced it before.
The second part of this book explores Jack’s perspective as Finn's closest friend. This section starts with Jack finding out that his best friend has passed suddenly. In my opinion, Jack’s part of the book was the most heartbreaking; I felt like I could best connect to his grief. Even though I’ve personally never lost someone, I could imagine what it would feel like to lose my own best friend. It allows the narrative to go beyond the heartbreaking love story that was the first book and shows how Autumn was not the only person who was affected by Finn’s passing.
The story ends with Autumn’s point of view and picks up from where the first book ended, which makes the story truly come full circle since that is where Finn and Autumn’s story first began. Autumn has just given birth to her and Finn’s baby. We see how Autumn deals with this fact and how she is able to push through the grief of losing the love of her life and having to raise their child without him. This part does not hold back and you’re able to see deep into Autumn’s emotions and her flaws. I think that Autumn is an important character because she represents every teenage girl who is scared to be vulnerable and who makes mistakes. While a lot of people like to judge Autumn for who she is, she is continuously, authentically, herself.
Bound to Enjoy
If Only I Had Told her is a great book for anyone who enjoys a coming-of-age story that explores themes of love, friendship, and grief. This book is perfect for someone who enjoys a book even if it makes them cry. I think that this story is great for anyone ages 13-18 who likes novels that delve into a character's life and their relationships.
Highlights (LITerally)
“I know I will always love her in the same way I know I’ll always need oxygen.” (35).
“I am alive. I've always been alive. But today I feel it.” (173).
“When she hugs me goodbye, it doesn't feel like goodbye. It feels like hugging Finn” (278-279).
One Last Thing…
I rate this book 4/5 stars. I wish that Finn’s part of the story was longer, and I wish that the author hadn't cut out so many parts that we could’ve seen from his perspective. I also did think that the writing was sometimes lacking, feeling slightly immature at times; although, that may have been a choice the author made purposefully. But I truly did love this book even though it made me cry a thousand times. It displayed grief in such a beautiful and profound way.
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